First Day on the Job

(Originally written on August 24, 2009)

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As the post title implies, today was my first day on the job at B&B!  Although, the guy who’s supposed to be training me is out of the office closing on a house and they didn’t really know what to do with me in lieu of that fact.  But I think I’m really gonna like it here.

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I sat in on a flu meeting today that covered both the seasonal flu and the swine flu and how they’re trending (B&B is in the over-the-counter drug industry).  HOLY SHIT – it’s really scary.

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I awoke yesterday morning only to find a late-night text from Mario:

I miss you already. : (

Ugh!  Why does he have to do that?

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I’m definitely going to stop drinking after tonight (I’m finishing off the two mix-six packs that I bought yesterday:  mostly local microbrews that I’ve never heard of before – I had to give ‘em a try!).  When I got dressed this morning, I couldn’t fit into a pair of dress pants that I’ve never had a problem fitting into, which knocks out half of my “temporary” clothes to tide me over until I find an apartment because all of my other pants are from the same store in the same size, just in different colors.  Beast told me that it’s probably from all the beer I’ve been drinking.  Well, my wardrobe is reason enough to take some time off the sauce!  Besides, of my two favorite coworkers (so far, that is), one of them is pregnant and the other one has a six-month-old baby, so neither of them drink…

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So, as I referred to above, until I find an apartment, I am residing in the Best Western – which from-here-on-out will be referred to as the B-Dub.  Oh my god, when I worked out in the hotel exercise room this afternoon (this was my first time; I just checked in yesterday), they had absolutely no air-conditioning on!  I had to turn it on myself when I came in, which really didn’t do anything on my behalf because even at full blast it would probably take longer to cool the room than the 30 minutes that I spent on the treadmill.  AND there was no door on the hinges of the entry to the exercise room (which was so conveniently located directly in front of the air-conditioning unit across the room)…and everyone in the hall seemed to make an effort to stare at me as they walked by.  It made me really uncomfortable, especially since I was sweating more intensely than usual due to the lack of AC.

My Departure

(Originally written on August 22, 2009)

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Today I began my journey to Philly.  And I got off to a late start – I wanted to leave by 10am, but things kept piling up onto each other and it just didn’t happen.

One of the things that held me up was Chip’s and Dale’s birthday lunch (they turned 19 today).  By the time I got to Beast’s and Martyr’s house to drop off Peabody and Lilly, it was around 11:30am; hence, I decided that I may as well stay for lunch.  Martyr is currently studying to become a masseuse and was getting out of class at 12:30pm-ish, so I shared a couple of beers with Beast, Chip, and Dale in the meantime (early, I know, but I wasn’t just going to leave perfectly good beer sitting in my empty apartment after moving out – and sharing it with Beast, Chip, and Dale is much better than just leaving it with them and not being able to partake in the drinking of it myself!).

Also at the house was my grampa (Martyr’s dad).  He and my brothers have always had a special bond.  And by that I mean that it is public knowledge to the entire family that Chip and Dale are his favorite grandkids.  Martyr thinks that he has gone out of his way to make such a dramatic effort with them in order to somehow make up for and/or forgive himself for being such a poor father.  (Grampa was a drill sergeant in the Army and was outrageously strict whenever he was actually home – he did two additional, voluntary tours in Vietnam and one additional, voluntary tour in Korea on top of his mandatory tours.  Of course there’s more to it than that, but that’s the base of it, I believe.)  So, anyways, it was no surprise that Grampa made the three-hour drive for their birthday.

Well, let’s just say that Grampa and I have had our disagreements throughout the years.  I have a pretty strong personality and he is very structured in his ways – it’s his way or the highway.  He also drove semis for a living after retiring from the Army (he gets restless if he doesn’t have something to do), so he’s really familiar with the national highway system and such.  So, for example, while we were waiting on Martyr this morning/early afternoon, Grampa took the opportunity (as he does) to tell me how to drive – and there’s no interrupting him once he’s started!  So even though I sat there and repeatedly and continually said, “I know, Grampa, that’s exactly the route that I’ve already decided I’m taking,” I still had to listen to his whole 20-minute spiel.  And then he went on and on about how there are a lot of toll roads up in the northeast (which my Google Maps directions already told me about and for which I brought my change collection).  He just likes to take charge of everything…and it’s kind of a pain-in-the-ass.

So, anyways, back to the birthday lunch – as we were sitting there and I was getting ready to depart on my journey, Grampa turns to Martyr and asks her if it would be alright for him to come with her whenever she brings up Peebs and Lil.  And she said YES!  Why the hell would Martyr tell him that it’s okay for him to come up and help me move in?!  Shouldn’t that be MY decision? Ugh! I can just see him telling me exactly how to arrange everything in my apartment…

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The drive today was a nightmare:  I drove past/through three accidents that brought traffic to a standstill.  For the last one, I only moved five miles in one hour.  Come on, people!  After passing the first accident you should have taken it as a sign that you should drive more carefully – let alone after passing the second one!

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The ceiling of this Holiday Inn Express is glittered…  I even called down to the front desk to check if it’s supposed to be that way.  It is.  That kinda creeps me out…

There Goes the Neighborhood

(Originally written on August 17, 2009)

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I just realized that Tomboy has moved into my soon-to-be-former apartment complex.

Great.  Just the bitch that I want to see when I visit home.

Even though I know I don’t want to be with Gaston, I’m still not over him.  And Tomboy’s presence here is just going to make it more likely that I’ll see him here staying with her for every football weekend that I make it to.  Especially because I always suspected that they were more than just friends.  I mean, she transferred here to resume classes this fall semester after one year at a top law school just to be closer to Gaston.  Regardless of how hard I tried (which I did, because she was Gaston’s best friend), I never did like her from the first time I met her.

It’s just a painful reminder.

Of all the nicer, newer apartment complexes to live in in this town, WHY HERE?

Waiting Room Angst

(Originally written on August 12, 2009)

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Right now, I’m at the orthodontist waiting to get new retainers.  (I had braces from fourth to ninth grade that Beast paid a pretty penny for – so you’re damn right I still sleep in my retainers!  Ursula never wore hers and ended up having to get braces for a second time as a result.  And I definitely don’t want to go through having braces again, especially now that I’m older.  Well, I’ve outgrown my retainers since I was last fitted for them five years ago and I wanted to be sure that I got new ones before moving 800 miles away.)  Good god, they take their sweet time making those things – I have been sitting here for forever (okay, a little over an hour – but they told me it would only take 20 minutes).  I mean, the process of taking the molds is torture enough.  And there’s this mother in the waiting room who keeps popping her flip-flops to the beat of every single song that plays.  Come on, she’s a grown woman!  It’s driving me crazy!

Twitter n’ Bones

(Originally written on August, 10, 2009)

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A couple of days ago, Mario tweeted the following:

I love somebody who cannot be loved.

I can’t help but know that he’s referring to me and how I’m not interested in him as anything more than a friend.  And that just puts me in an uncomfortable place.  Why does he have to go and do stuff like that?  I really wonder if everyone else catches onto that or knows that that’s the situation.

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I was watching Bones this evening and the following quote had me in stitches for literally half-an-hour – if not longer:

I clicked on a pop-up and got caught in a pornado!

Ha ha ha!  I love it!

When is Love gonna stop shitting on me?

(Originally written on August 2, 2009)

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Out of the blue, Sparrow sent me a text this afternoon saying that he was in the area and asking if he could stop by and see me.  He had just finished up his gig working at the summer camp and was driving to the beach for a relaxing vacay, one without children.  I was hesitant because I hadn’t showered and my apartment was (and still is, might I add) a disastrous mess.  But after talking, we came to the realization that it was going to be the last time we’d be able to see each other before I make my move to Philly (and, therefore, probably the last time we may ever see each other).  So I invited him up to my messy apartment and we watched some more Monty Python’s Flying Circus.

Then it turned into makeout-fest.

Sparrow never was a very good kisser – he used to be absolutely awful!  He’s better now, though:  less of the just forceful shoving of his tongue down my throat, but way to passive and timid – when kissing, that is; when it comes to anything beyond that, he moves really fast.

Practically without me noticing it, he had quickly wrapped my legs around his waist.  Then, he spun me around on top of him, into his lap and he began powerfully gyrating up against me (all of this is mid-makeout-fest, by the way).  It was impossible for me not to notice how “excited” he was, if you know what I mean.  Anyways…  Then my shirt started to come off.

Well, like I said, I hadn’t showered and I didn’t want to be lame and be like, “Can we take a timeout real quick so that I can prep the downstairs?”  So, for the first time ever in my entire life, I pulled the classic girl move – which is incredibly awful, I know – and told Sparrow that it was “the bad time of the month”.  I know.

But here’s what gets me:  once we were settled back down and Sparrow was getting ready to leave, I mentioned possibly picking back up where we left off when he moves to Princeton (it’s only about an hour away from Philly; I’ve Google-mapped it) and he replied,

We’ll see, but I don’t think it’s very probable.

I am such a stupid, stupid girl.

Well, I know I won’t be wasting any more of my time with him!

The Search Is FINALLY Over!

(Originally written on July 27, 2009)

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I GOT THE B&B JOB!!!!!

I received this glorious news via a phone call at around 10 this morning.

I can’t believe it:  I actually got a job.  I was really starting to lose hope in the possibility that I would find one, especially in this economy.  For the past two-and-a-half months, I have spent HOURS EVERY DAY scouring the internet for job postings and applying to approximately seven of them on average each day.  Maybe 10 companies contacted me back throughout that entire time – and I was always rejected every time either because my Master’s degree made me overqualified or because I didn’t have enough job experience.  I was truly beginning to think that my only option was that I was going to have to ask Beast for a job at his distributorship.

Be that as it may, I immediately burst into tears of joyous relief following that phone call.  After composing myself, the first person I called was Beast; I couldn’t wait for him to know that I wasn’t just this overrated failure after all.  However, he was unreachable because he was in-flight on his way home from wherever it is that he was this time, which, I believe, was out-of-the-country (he travels a lot for work, both nationally and internationally).  So, unsurprisingly, the next person I called was Martyr.  And she didn’t answer either!  Ahh – all I wanted to do was share my wonderful news with someone else!  Mario was working, so I texted him, and then I called Scarlet.  Someone FINALLY picked up! That conversation went as can be expected and then Martyr called me back.

Martyr was, of course, incredibly enthusiastic (she went on and on about how god “blessed” me with this job and how she’d been praying and praying that I would get this particular job) and we decided to go to Polly’s for celebratory wine and lunch.  Punky was the day bartender/server.  Punky currently lives with Leto in the apartment below mine since Belle moved out.  She’s really cool; I like her a lot.  Anyways, after Martyr and I had finished eating, Punky insisted on buying me a congratulatory dessert.  That was really nice of her to do and something I wasn’t expecting – so I gratefully accepted it and made her indulge in a bite or two with me!

Also while we were at Polly’s, Beast got around to calling me back and I was able to share my good news with him.  After finishing our drinks (I had a few more than Martyr, who was driving), Martyr dropped me back off at my apartment and we set up plans to send Chip and Dale to pick me up later this evening and bring me to the house for dinner.

Then, just when I thought it couldn’t get any better, B&B called me back at around 3 this afternoon to discuss with me the exact details of my offer.  In our previous discussions, they had left me with the expectation of a salary somewhere in the ballpark of $75,000.  That was shocking enough.  But this, I was in no way prepared for:  the HR woman on the phone told me that I will be receiving an annual salary of $85,000 PLUS 10% bonuses PLUS benefits:  health, vision, and dental insurance AND a relocation package.

Yea.

This news literally left me in shock – my whole body shaking in utter, well, shock.  Throughout the entire delivery of this information, I pretty much just sat there in silence with my jaw gaping wide open.  At the end of the (one-way) conversation after informing me of all this, the HR woman then said, “I know that’s a little more than we had discussed…”

Yea, no kidding!

Communication Breakdown (Continued)

(Originally written on July 27, 2009)

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Yesterday, I told Scarlet about Gaston’s text from Saturday and asked for his opinion on the matter.  Scarlet is really good with that kind of stuff.  He suggested that I simply say hello back, that there was no harm in saying hi.  He made a good point; I was convinced.  So, starting with Gaston’s text from Saturday, here’s how the exchange went:

Hey

Hi

How are u

I’m okay.  How are you?

Im good just bored in [south Georgia] trying to bide my time working on the job hunt

And that was that.  And let me just get this out of my system real quick:  I HATE it when

1. people can’t write out the word “you”, and
2. when people don’t use at least somewhat proper punctuation.

Okay, that’s better.  So anyways, I mean, Gaston didn’t really leave me with anywhere to take the conversation from that point.  What was I supposed to say?  “Yea, me too”?  So that was it.

Communication Breakdown

(Originally written on July 25, 2009)

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Bluto is here…that’s odd.  I can’t believe that he made the five-hour drive down here just to help Gaston move.

They were all here yesterday/last night:  Bluto, Gaston, Rowdy, Napoleon, Leto.  I was trapped inside of my apartment all day and night in order to avoid running into them, but that didn’t stop me from periodically peering out at them through my blinds (childish, I know).  Then, they had a little “party” at Leto’s apartment last night; her living room is right below mine.  It went on for hours and they were being SOOO loud, I couldn’t help but hear them yukking it up down there.  Especially because I had the volume on my TV turned down low and I made a conscious effort to make as minimal noise as possible – I just prefer that they not know I was there and I wanted to be invisible to them, not even an afterthought in the backs of their minds.  Oh well, I’m glad to see to see them leave.

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Gaston sent me a text that simply read, “Hey”, at 12:30 this afternoon as he was in the process of moving out.  That’s the first time there has been any communication between us at all since June 3^rd.  I hope he’s not expecting for me to respond.  And even if he is, he could have at least tried a little harder than just, “Hey”…

Something to Celebrate!

(Originally written on July 24, 2009)

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Gaston’s mattresses are sitting outside!  YES!  He’s finally gonna be gone!